Once when. . . Postcard 4
Based on the presentation by Peter Taminiau.
Today we arrived in Havana. It was hot and our backpacks felt heavier by the minute. We took a taxi, a beautiful turquoise Plymouth. The interior was still like it had just driven of the factory line. It would have taken me straight into a fifties groove, if we had felt a bit more feminine. Right now we were sweaty, tired and wearing pants that were ready for a wash three days ago. Not a presence to make you feel remotely like Doris Day or Audrey Hepburn.
Luckily the casa particulare ‘our’ family in Viñales suggested, was as lovely as our hosts told us. A cold shower, short nap, clean clothes and a lovely fruit dish – these pineapples are to die for! – later we were ready to face the music.
Ten minutes into the streets we were as hot and sticky as two hours earlier, but we did not have to go very far, the music is everywhere, on every corner and from every building sounds emerge and salsa is everywhere and within everyone!
Today we arrived in Havana. It was hot and our backpacks felt heavier by the minute. We took a taxi, a beautiful turquoise Plymouth. The interior was still like it had just driven of the factory line. It would have taken me straight into a fifties groove, if we had felt a bit more feminine. Right now we were sweaty, tired and wearing pants that were ready for a wash three days ago. Not a presence to make you feel remotely like Doris Day or Audrey Hepburn.
Luckily the casa particulare ‘our’ family in Viñales suggested, was as lovely as our hosts told us. A cold shower, short nap, clean clothes and a lovely fruit dish – these pineapples are to die for! – later we were ready to face the music.
Ten minutes into the streets we were as hot and sticky as two hours earlier, but we did not have to go very far, the music is everywhere, on every corner and from every building sounds emerge and salsa is everywhere and within everyone!
posted by Karin Stronkhorst at
2:40 AM
1 Comments:
Karin,
You are very good at honing in on the most interesting details to discuss and structuring them in an effective way. Many of these postcards--on Cuba, Italy, and the boring article--make extremely enjoyable reading. The Cuban postcard is very chic. Use an appostrophe in boy's adventure tale. "Check of" should be "check off", and later in the last set of answers, then should be "than".
In the opening on the Phillipines, two sentences are wordy. "Some poeple wish" is more direct than "For some poeple, they wish", and "destination wishes" can be just as effective without wishes.
"Plenty entertained" is not said, but you can say "plenty of entertainment" or "thoroughly entertained". Woman's rights needs an apostrophe, and family-run needs a dash when it is an adjective before a noun.
"Rollercoaster ride we did" can be more direct as "rollercoaster we rode". Finally, the phrase "Although I have stopped five times in Bangkok" is clearer than the phrase that is there.
The concrete details and interesting material that you have taken up makes your blog really interesting to read. You only need to write two more postcards on presentations, but keep up the good writing in the rest of the course!
Sincerely,
Tomas Pollard
By
TomasPollard, at 11:07 AM
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